Loving Three....Loving Five

        

     I love Five.  

     Five is our firstborn, and a total opposite personality from Three.  He and food are inseparable.  He is fiercely protective of and competitive with Three.  Five is already very skilled in math, music, and maps. If we have ever been on a road in his lifetime since age 2ish (even a bit before that) he remembers and tells us where we were going the last time we were on that road....simply amazing.  He keeps good pitch while singing, and is doing great with piano lessons.  (We just won't talk about phonics!)  Five is a good helper, and loves to be given jobs around the house, which lessens my chore load considerably.

     Five is a thinker and an analyzer.  He often has questions about spiritual things- usually the result of musing on something we said in family devotions or something he heard in a sermon at church.  

     Five has many moods and attitudes, making him a bit more of a challenge in child rearing.  I feel lost sometimes in relating to Five's boyness.  I pray daily for wisdom to raise Five in a Godly way.

     I don't know how many years we will have Five.  I do know that there were many days pre-Five in which we knew that we may not ever have Five.  And because of all of the hospitalizations and physical trauma involved before, during and after his birth,  Five and I did not bond in the early days like most moms and newborns do.  The struggles that result from that are much like the struggles that adoptive parents face.   I know that God has something special planned for Five, and I am thankful for God's continued grace in both of our lives.

     

I love Three.

     She's irresistable and oh-so-kissable.  She has a personality that is full of spunk and expression.  She is flighty. She is in her own girly world.  She is simply delightful.  She is 100% girl and often pretends she is a grown woman.  I connect with her.  She has a tender heart for others, and is very sensitive to their needs. She is the first to offer a pillow, a drink, and a prayer if someone isn't feeling well.  She mothers her dolls and stuffed animals with a fierce loyalty that keeps me on my toes. We often remind each other that "you are a good mommy."  (Who knew that my daughter would be the one to teach me how to be a mother?)

     Three's birth was a part of the healing process for my husband and myself.  After Five was born,  we didn't have much reason left to hope that we could have a Three.  Even though my pregnancy once again found me in the hospital and then heavily medicated for 9 months, her birth was incredibly fast and easy, allowing for instant bonding and a quick recovery.  Three somewhat restored my shattered dreams of what having children was going to be like.  She is the flower of our family!

     I can't imagine life without Three.  In light of the Cretzman's recent loss,  I've been giving her more cuddles and kisses.  Things can change so fast. I don't know how long we will get to enjoy Three, but I'm going to savour every moment I can.

     I love Three. 

    I love Five. 

I know I need God's wisdom to help me love them even more, and in the way they need to be loved.... with gentleness and grace.  

Just like my heaveny Father loves me.

Leah